Those Extraordinary Twins

By Mark Twain

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...THOSE EXTRAORDINARY TWINS


by Mark Twain




Contents

CHAPTER I. ...

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...a sufficiently hard time with that tale, because it changed itself
from a farce to a...

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...of the team I had originally started out with--Aunt Patsy Cooper,
Aunt Betsy Hale, the two...

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...statistic:

"Rowena went out in the back yard after supper to see the fireworks and
fell down...

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...be quiet a minute and don't fly around so; it
fairly makes me tired to see...

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...and of course that kind of names are not suited to our
climate--you wouldn't expect it."

[And...

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...of manner and yet had shaken them up like an
earthquake with the shock of its...

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...Each has an arm on each shoulder. Now
then, you tell me which of them belongs...

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...the day. The cravats were as broad as a bankbill, with
fringed ends which stood far...

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...try, you could
learn too, and then you would stop spoiling my comfort with your
everlasting complaints."

"Ah,...

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...of music, and I don't claim it, but in my opinion nobody can
make those two...

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...you have coffee, gentlemen, or tea?"

"Coffee for Luigi, if you please, madam, tea for me."

"Cream...

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...didn't carry it to my mouth, but to his."

"Y-es, I thought you did: Did you...

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...and paid for the
one bed only. The landlords often insisted that as both of us...

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..."I declare
I'll never rest till I've shook you by the hand," and she scrambled out
of...

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...affair--"

"I'll never Mister him again!" cried the widow, with strong emotion,
"he's Luigi to me, from...

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...Free-thinker. The judge was very proud of his Freethinkers'
Society,...

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...of course as soon as his mind cleared
and these diseased imaginings passed away, he shuddered...

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...have refused permission.




CHAPTER IV. SUPERNATURAL CHRONOMETRY

Rowena was dining out, Joe and Harry were belated at...

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...couldn't be improved. I'll prove it to you.
If our legs tried to obey two wills,...

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...command this
week. Now, if on Saturday night at a moment before midnight we could
fly in...

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...of a minute sooner than the other one gets all the
land and grandeurs and nobilities...

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...would I," said Aunt Patsy with the emphasis of a
certainty that is not impaired by...

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...time. If Tom
were doing that, or was even trying to do it, the judge would...

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...in the false position of seeming to indorse
and approve his brother's fickleness; moreover, he had...

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...his feet and discharged into the midst of the audience. We can prove
this by four...

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...would both want
to resent it, and so--"

"Wait! You are theorizing now. Stick to facts--counsel will...

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...stood right behind them, and saw them do it."

"How many kicks were delivered?"

"Only one."

"If two...

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...the world that could
tell t'other from which, sir."

"Do you still assert that last night's kick...

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...his conviction when the charge
as originally brought promises to fail to convict, is a thing...

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...Mr. John Buckstone, who is now present, and I beg that
Mrs. Patsy Cooper may be...

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...ladies stopped and shook hands with the twins with effusion,
then gave the judge a friendly...

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...that's neither here nor
there. I know, without that, that at dinner yesterday, Angelo was as
tired...

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...if we can save these
poor persecuted strangers, it is our bounden duty to stand up...

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...expose their
guilt, but support failed me where I had most right to expect aid and
encouragement....

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...the haunted house. Pudd'nhead Wilson
advanced to meet them, and said anxiously:

"I must say a word...

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...away at any time they chose during that recitation, but not
after the last word. Angelo...

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...off at the same
instant, and he jumped once more; he got a sharp scrape along...

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...arrive, and Luigi would
get off with all the credit of seeming to want to fight...

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...and in the afternoon Angelo was to be received
into the...

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...hide his rising tears, and his
brother Joe said to himself, with a sense of loss,...

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...hermodactyls, roses, thyme, acorns, pennyroyal, gentian,
the bark of the root of mandrake, germander, valerian, bishop's-weed,
bayberries,...

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...might prove fatal."

A tender and ecstatic smile beamed from Angelo's eyes, and he broke
forth in...

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...cheek affectionately with her
finger. "Rowena, take the prescription and go in the kitchen and hunt...

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...that it was moral courage that
took him from the field, what have they to say...

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...and you mustn't retch and gag
that way, either--you'll wake up your poor brother."

"Well, what of...

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...he was left alone in this
glory, for the Whigs had no man who was willing...

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...drowsiness overtook him and his head drooped against Luigi's
and he went to sleep. Luigi apologized...

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...fairly and
legally chosen alderman. The case was carried up and up from court to
court, yet...